Showing posts with label Empowerment. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Empowerment. Show all posts

Tuesday 6 November 2012

Counselling and politics - hopes and dreams in context.

On the day of the US elections, I've been thinking about politics and what it might mean for ordinary people. How relevant are politics in our everyday lives?

As individuals, we have hopes and dreams for ourselves and others. How these play out is in part determined or limited by ourselves, and in part limited by the society in which we live. In counselling, we can take a look at ourselves, maybe discover there is more to us than we previously supposed. This can be hopeful and empowering; but where do we go from here? To pretend we can do anything we wish is patronising.

Whatever we may be capable of achieving, there also need to be opportunities within our society in order to realise these ambitions. I am not arguing for a 'nanny state,' where we are passively looked after, with no responsibility for ourselves. I do feel however that we need to care for each other in a co-operative way. This can work at an individual level and in the way we are as a society, including its politics.

Of course politicians can make all kinds of promises which play on our hopes and dreams - it gets votes.  Being able to deliver on these promises is another thing. With limited resources, we may not be able to do everything we want. This means making choices we would rather not have to make. In politics, there have to be choices and therefore priorities, although what is the priority may change over time.

In prioritising one thing, we may have to face the loss of some other possibility. Just when we choose something really good, at the same time we are not choosing something else. We can feel sad at the same time as feeling good. We feel conflict within ourselves. This can make us stuck and go round in circles, not wanting to make decisions. This happens for us as individuals and in the field of politics. Nobody wants to say 'No we can't do that, even though it's a good thing to do.'

However, accepting the potential losses in difficult decisions can allow us to become unstuck and move forward. It can be painful and challenging; but it is also liberating. It means that we can get on with our lives. We can make plans and look forward to the future in a realistic way.

Lin Travis Counselling Services

Tuesday 9 October 2012

Empowering qualities in counselling

Coming to therapy, and asking for help, can seem like a big step. People may feel that somehow they should be able to cope or at least muddle through on their own. They should be able to do this and they ought to be able to do that. Sometimes though the 'shoulds' and 'oughts' aren't enough - that's just not how you feel.


The counselling room in Stroud, Gloucestershire
The counselling room in Stroud, Gloucestershire
Having a space to talk about what bothers you and to reflect on your concerns can in itself be helpful. This is a place where it is okay to talk about you and how you feel. That can be a relief. We are not generally used to having that space just for ourselves. It's a space where you can talk and that means also a space where you are listened to. What you say is heard and considered.

This therapeutic space can also be containing. To come along each week, and talk for a set amount of time, and then stop, can help contain difficult thoughts, anxieties, and painful feelings.Talking in therapy and learning to contain these thoughts and feelings can help us gain a healthy control of them. This can be an empowering experience.

I feel that empowerment is an important concept in therapy. It has sometimes been said that counselling or therapy can create a dependency. However I feel that effective counselling does the opposite. It empowers people by helping them gain more understanding of themselves and in attaining a more healthy control of their emotional life. In that way they may be better equipped to deal with any difficulties, not only in the present, but in the future too.

Lin Travis Counselling Services